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5 SCTV AM News Today: Big News/Little News

Floyd has some big news items. Earl has some little local news items. Frustrated, he makes up a big item of his own.

Floyd Robertson - Joe Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Eugene Levy

10 SCTV PM News: Big News/Little News continued

Robertson interrupts Earl's item with news of Johnny LaRue's rampage, possibly the biggest disaster in entertainment history.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

5 SCTV AM News Today: Wire Services on Strike

They don't have much information.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

10 SCTV PM News - Paper Shuffling

Earl shows Floyd how to straighten his papers.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

5 SCTV AM News: Earl in San Francisco

Ragtime piano playing world record broken. Earl didn't quite make it to San Francisco to do a feature on an upcoming earthquake.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

2 SCTV AM News Today: Earl Asleep

Earl has trouble staying awake.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

6 SCTV News Today: Alternative Perspectives

Bob Park fills in for Larnell with the Black Perspective. Earl then fills in for Erica with the feminist perspective.

Bob Park - Thomas; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

12 SCTV PM News Today: Floyd Breaks Up

Floyd reads an amusing item, and then laughs through Earl's editorial.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

3 SCTV AM News Today: Action Line (Rent Strike) / Viewer Letters

Consumer Action Line solves a rent strike; LaRue goes on an eating protest for peace in the Middle East; News Views Letters features letters complimentary of Floyd.

Bess Verness - Martin; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy; Black Lung Pipers - male cast; Johnny LaRue - Candy

10 Promo: 15 Minutes

A dynamic new newsmagazine. Floyd will have stories on millionaires in the Bahamas and a pleasure palace in New Orleans. Earl will have stories on prison and worms in dogs.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

4 SCTV AM News Today: Earl plays taped music

Floyd has a story on Beirut fighting. Earl plays taped music to add colour to his trivial items. Malta declares war on Corsica. Floyd destroys his tape recorder.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

1 SCTV News: New Deli

Another earthquake in Togoland. Earl files a report from New Delhi.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy; deli customers - Thomas, Tony Rosato, Candy, extras

Additional Viewing: Therese et Joe, directed by "Jean-Luc Resnais," takes on the French New Wave, with nods to Jean-Luc Goddard, Alain Resnais and Francois Truffaut (thanks JR).

9 SCTV PM News: Commentary from Earl - Terrorism

Earl makes an appeal to all terrorists.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

3 SCTV AM News Today: Earl's trip to Helsinki

Earl shows slides of his trip to Helsinki. He doesn't get past slides from the airport when Floyd chews him out. So Earl shows a slide of Floyd hammered at a party.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; cop - Thomas

8 SCTV News: Earl's coughing fit

Fierce fighting in Albania. Parks closed for Physical Fitness week - but Earl has trouble delivering his item. More quakes in Togo. Earl is unable to give his last item. New ice age.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

4 Promo: SCTV News: Earl pitches sex items

Earl promotes some lewd news items.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; staff - O'Hara

3 SCTV AM News Today: Earl Jr. Visits

Earl's son helps co-anchor the News, but isn't so good at reading big words. In other news, another earthquake in Togo. (Note: New news set, same opening credits)

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Jr - Donald Cowper

3 SCTV AM News Today: Earl's attire/Roda Barret's Hollywood

Earl's attire causes technical problems so Floyd sends him off to change (twice) and takes his items; Johnny LaRue reports on the seal hunt in Labrador and saves a seal; Air Togo piggy back air service. Earl introduces Roda.

4 Roda Barret's Hollywood: Roy Rogers, Spiro Agnew

Roda has the news from Hollywood, mecca of Gods with feet of clay.

Roda Barret (Rona Barrett) - O'Hara

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Johnny LaRue - Candy; activists, hunter - extras

7 Good-Bye America: Johnny LaRue Part 1

Heraldo visits a party at Johnny LaRue's penthouse apartment. He brushes off Earl. Johnny shows him around. Bobby Bittman shows off Johnny's charity awards; they persuade Bobby to do a bit. Heraldo then chats with Connie Franklin (who sings some of her new material from 'Disco Connie').

Heraldo Rivera - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy; Johnny LaRue - Candy; Bobby Bittman - Levy; Connie Franklin - Martin; Harvey K-Tel - Thomas; Moe Green - Ramis; Trish Nutly - O'Hara; gerbils, weasels - extras

5 SCTV AM News Today: Earl Editorial on Women Newscasters

South Moluccans demand independence. Johnny LaRue opens health club for rabbits. Earl has an outrageous commentary on women newscasters.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

4 SCTV AM News Today: Earl's Item doesn't come up

Earl's filmed item on Commissioner Shaeffer's resignation doesn't come up. Female Lutonian athletes on a goodwill tour go shopping and sightseeing (hardware store, lingerie store, shoe store). Earl's film still doesn't come up. US loan to Togoland. Earl's film finally comes up (Police Commissioner Shaeffer has a coronary).

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy; Russian Gymnast - Martin; Russian Weight lifter - Candy; Shoe Salesman - Ramis; Commissioner Shaeffer - Thomas; Cop - Tony Rosato; Bodyguard - Candy; Cop - extra

4 SCTV AM News Today: Dogs

Floyd's items are Saudi Arabia declares war on Yemen; new 'almost equal rights' amendment; Togo withdraws from earthquake insurance program; Earl has a series of stories with a dog tie-in. He then proceeds to give an editorial on dogs. Floyd introduces Roda.

5 Rhoda Barret's Hollywood: Indira Gandhi

Roda has some clips from Indira Gandhi's new club show. Indira deals with a heckler.

Roda Barret - O'Hara; Indira Gandhi - Martin; Swami Banananda - Ramis; crowd - Thomas, Candy, Levy

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

4 SCTV AM News Today: Terrorist Picnic

Floyd has footage of host Bob Baker going mad on the set of Truth or Consequences. Earl has footage of the International Association of Terrorists picnic.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Bob Baker - Thomas; Contestant - Martin; crew - extras; Terrorists - Martin, Ramis, O'Hara, Thomas, extras; Tool and Dye workers - Candy, extras

4 SCTV AM News Today: Mafia Interview

Earl interviews a top figure in organized crime in Melonville.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Mafia Hit man - Candy

6 The Uncle Earl Show

The Uncle Earl show is cancelled.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Moe Green - Ramis; Johnny LaRue - Candy

6 SCTV News: Informal chit-chat

Earl tries to lighten the newscast with chit-chat. Floyd has an item on mudslides in Togo and Tarzan accepting the help of mercenaries, and gets Earl to cut back the chit chat.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

4 SCTV News: Moe Green Kidnapped

An outbreak of legionnaire's disease breaks out in Hawaii; Plattsburg cleanup; and Earl keeps forgetting the Moe Green kidnapping item - he's been kidnapped by Leftists for Lutonia. To finish, Earl gives an editorial about the kidnapping.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

10 SCTV News Bulletin: Message from Moe Green

A tape from Moe Green has arrived after SCTV refused to pay the excessive $2000 ransom. Earl and Floyd discusses it.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy; Moe Green - Ramis

5 SCTV News: Thesaurus

Floyd and Earl have to write their own items because of the strike; Earl uses a thesaurus while Floyd tries to be hard-hitting.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

3 SCTV Election Central Part 1: Highlights from The Great Debate

SCTV News coverage of the election begins with some highlights of the debate between candidates.

Clip: The Great Debate

Earl, Johnny's campaign manager, is the moderator. Jack wants to face the ultimate political confrontation; Shirley wants a political theater; and Johnny proposes a bird sanctuary/casino.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Johnny LaRue - Candy; Jack Brown - Thomas, Shirley McLennan-Black - O'Hara

Early returns come in with LaRue far behind.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Election Central staff - Peter Wildman, extras

3a SCTV Election Central Part 2: Statistics

Earl has some election statistics.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Election Central staff - Peter Wildman, extras

3b SCTV Election Central Part 3: LaRue's Speech

Earl is at Johnny's campaign headquarters to get Johnny's reaction to his defeat (he's bitter). Note: Johnny's slogan is Legalize LaRue.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Johnny LaRue - Candy; campaigners, Election Central staff - Peter Wildman, extras

3 SCTV News: Happy Endings

Earl finds a happy ending to all his items. Mayor Tommy Shanks is referred to in one item.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; crew - extras

2 SCTV News: Earl's Editorial about his neighbors

Bad News Bears suspended; marijuana and liquor cause disorientation; Edith Prickley's appointment as Station Manager is announced; Earl gives an editorial carping about his neighbors.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Edith Prickley (photo only) - Martin

1 SCTV 30th Anniversary Show Part 1

The evening's hosts are introduced, and Earl and Floyd start things off by introducing an excerpt from a 1952 hearing featuring Earl's dad.

1952 Hearing on Un-American Activities

Earl's dad rats on his grandmother.

Merle Camembert - Levy; Congressmen - Thomas, Candy; Merle's Lawyer - extra; Audience - extras

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Announcer - staff announcer
Johnny LaRue - Candy; Lola Heatherton - O'Hara; Lin Ye Tang - Thomas; Cheryl Kinsey - Martin;

1b SCTV 30th Anniversary Show Part 3

Cheryl Kinsey and Lola Heatherton introduce the classic panel show "What's My Shoesize?".

What's My Shoesize?

Panelists fail to guess the shoesize of contestant Barry Stubing (size 16)

Dorothy Kilgallen ('Kilpatrick') - O'Hara; Bennett Cerf ('Cerb') - Thomas; Arlene Francis ('Franklin') - Martin; Kirk Douglas ('Dugglis') - Flaherty; Host: John Charles Daly ('Bailey') - Levy; Contestant: Barry Stubing - Candy; Announcer - staff announcer

Conclusion.

Lola Heatherton - O'Hara; Dr Kinsey - Martin

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Johnny LaRue - Candy; Lin Ye Tang - Thomas; Announcer ("John Speakers") - staff announcer

3 SCTV News: SCTV is Haunted

Floyd has a story about the station being haunted. Earl laughs it off, but starts hearing voices. Floyd has a final scary news item.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

2 SCTV News: Marijuana

Earl's a bit high and has the munchies.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

3 SCTV News: Cash Prison Concert

Earl interviews some inmates about Johnny Cash playing at the Melonville state pen.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Prisoners - Candy, Thomas, extras

5 SCTV News: Earl's Wisdom Tooth

Melonville Savings and Trust heist. Earl has an impacted wisdom tooth and can't be understood, so Floyd takes his items. Floyd makes him laugh with the next item.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

7 SCTV News: Earl has problems with the crew

Earl doesn't like his chair, doesn't get a picture with his item, his marking pencil is missing, and takes it out on the crew; the crew strikes back.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; crew - extras

3 SCTV News Bulletin: Mayor Shanks' Speech

Pre-empting regular programming, the press have not been briefed on the Mayor's remarks...

Fireside Chat: The Weather

Mayor Shanks remarks on the weather and feeds a Hershey bar to a stuffed giraffe.

Mayor Tommy Shanks - Candy; Announcer - staff announcer

Earl tries to read between the lines. Floyd is disgusted.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Announcer - staff announcer

7 SCTV News: Consumer Action Line

Earl has an item on a doctor who has discovered mental illness is a virus. Floyd counters with an item where the good doctor is arrested with fraud. Perini Scleroso interviews an Irish mother of triplets. In a new segment, Consumer Action Line, Earl is put on hold.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Perini Scleroso - Martin; Mother of triplets - O'Hara

5 SCTV News: Earl's dinner

Earl eats dinner during the newscast.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

4 Teaser: SCTV News

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

6 SCTV News: Earl's fumblemouth

Togo blames quake on CIA. Earl has trouble delivering his items.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

2 Thursday Night Live

Live from Edmonton, it's SCTV's hip relevant new comedy show, hosted by Earl Camembert. Lots of whooping and hollering, drug references, and bad language.

Guest Host: Earl Camembert - Levy; Jill Ellen Charney - Martin; Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Announcer - Moranis; Marty Kleinberg - Rosato; Lisa Richards - Duke; John Laxo - Thomas; Sam Giannomelli - Moranis; Innumerable other cast members - Dick Blasucci, Gail Kerbel (Anna Stern), Paul Flaherty, extras; crew, whooping audience - Soccer player (Wally), Paul Flaherty, Bev Schectman, same extras

2 Teaser: SCTV News

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

6 SCTV News: Earl's film doesn't come up

Togo applies to come to Nebraska; Earl takes up the rest of the newscast smiling at the camera, waiting for the film of his bus race item.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

5 60/20

Earl hosts this hard-hitting investigative reporting program, and looks into the influence of television and the media. Earl talks to Dr. Angly from the state penitentiary, who figures it's the coffee Earl's drinking. He comes back two weeks later, and sure enough, Earl's got a better handle on things. Earl next interviews, detective Tulios, who blows him off. Jack Wallace turns the tables on Earl and takes over his show.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Dr. Robert Angly (Coffee Commercial pitch man) - Thomas; Detective Tulios - Rosato; cops - extras; Jack Wallace - Moranis; Announcer - staff announcer

3 Teaser: SCTV News

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

6 SCTV News: Travel Tips with Earl

Earl has clips from his vacation in St Lucia, where he was pestered by the locals.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Amanda - extra; Beach bums, waiters, nightclub act - extras

3 Teaser: SCTV News

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

7 SCTV News: Earl Plugs Products

Fire at ice pick factory. Soviets deny invading Yemen. Earl's items are blatant plugs for products (Tootsie Roll, Hertz). Floyd ends up doing him one better.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

2 Teaser: SCTV News

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

5 SCTV News: Earl on roller skates

Earl tries to make the newscast more hip. Lead item: Togo taunts Soviet Union. Earl accuses Floyd of not being young and hip.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

3 Teaser: SCTV News

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy

5 SCTV News: 4th Anniversary

Togo enters Guinness Book of Records for most quakes in a year. Earl's going to give an editorial on friendship, but first a message from their new sponsor.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

5a SCTV News: 4th Anniversary Part 2

Earl decides not to give his editorial.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

4 SCTV News: Pit Bulls

Orson Welles trapped in a restaurant booth; Earl has a special report on Pit Bull fighting.

Special Report: Pit Bull Fighting

Earl, disguised, covers a pit bull fight. The hicks discover he is a reporter. They lose the signal and cut to Comment.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Hicks - Moranis, Thomas, Rosato, extras

Comment with David Brinkley: Bad Haircut

Brinkley wonders what the hell is wrong with his barber.

David Brinkley - Moranis; announcer - staff announcer

Floyd still can't get through to Earl.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

4 Teaser: SCTV News

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

7 SCTV News: Walter Cronkite

Floyd has some really big items (new age-reversing drug, new planet), Earl some tiny ones (parking violation). Cronkite drops by the newsroom; Earl fawns while Walter congratulates Floyd. Walter sits in to do Earl's items, but is distressed to find none of them are any good. So he makes up one of his own.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Walter Cronkite - Thomas

4 Teaser: SCTV News

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

6 SCTV News: W.A.S.A.S.L.

Floyd has a story on Bill Needle being assaulted, while Earl has an interview with Spike, a tough representative of a women's group called WASASL.

Interview: Spike of W.A.S.A.S.L.

Spike challenges Earl to an arm wrestle.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Deborah 'Spike' Milligan - Duke; Jack the waiter - Rosato; bar patrons - extras

Back at the studio, Earl gets beaten by Floyd and a little kid.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Bill Needle (photo of him roughed up) - Thomas; Kid - extra

10 One On the Town: Levon Helm Part 1 85

Earl takes a behind the scenes look at Levon Helm. Levon's running behind, has to do a soundcheck, and can't talk to Earl. Levon performs Sweet Peach Georgia Wine inside, while outside, Earl thinks about questions he can ask.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Announcer - Moranis; Levon Helm with the Cate Brothers Band: Levon Helm - drums, vocals, harmonica, Earl Cate - guitar, Ernie Cate - keyboards, Ron Eoff - bass, Terry Cagle - drums; crew - crew

10a One On the Town: Levon Helm Part 2 85

Levon performs 'Summertime Blues'. With the crew complaining, Earl goes for some food. As Earl drives off, Levon's ready for the crew.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Levon Helm with the Cate Brothers Band: Levon Helm - drums, vocals, harmonica, Earl Cate - guitar, Ernie Cate - keyboards, Ron Eoff - bass, Terry Cagle - drums; audience - extras; crew - extras; announcer - staff announcer

3c LaRue Wrap Part 4: SCTV Corridors 80

LaRue runs into Camembert, who tries to tell him a joke. He then spots William Morris and chases him down. Apparently LaRue misunderstood the production costs that Morris had quoted him for Polynesiantown. LaRue demands big production values from Morris for Street Beef.

Johnny LaRue - Candy; Earl Camembert - Levy; William Morris (Sweating Weasel) - Thomas; Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Edith Prickley (voice only) - Martin

18 SCTV News: Floyd's rehab 112

Sponsored by Rolling Hills. Earl welcomes Floyd back. Items: Commies come out to Melonville May Day parade. Con man bilks Daughters of American Revolution. Johnny LaRue's car was blown up by protesters against his series "Johnnie's Angels." Earl gives an editorial about Guts, the kind of guts it took for Floyd ('known to millions of kids as Count Floyd') to beat his drinking problem. Floyd takes off.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Johnny LaRue - Candy; announcer - staff announcer

4a Lola Wrap Part 2: Newsroom 90

LaRue bums some money off Earl, who's running late and doesn't have a lead story, and discusses how Guy cancelled Lola's special. In the hall, LaRue relieves Cole of his cash and chocolate bars, and off handedly cracks that Lola's probably jumped out of her window by now. Cole tells Earl, and Earl has his lead story.

Johnny LaRue - Candy; Earl Camembert - Levy; Cole Elliot Durning - Moranis

8 SCTV News: Lola obituary 91

Earl interrupts Floyd with a bulletin: Lola Heatherton is dead, by her own hand, because she was distraught at the cancellation of her special. He gives a stirring career retrospective. Floyd interrupts him to announce that Lola is in fact still alive.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; announcer - staff announcer

4d Lola Wrap Part 5: Lola's Dressing Room 91

Lola wakes up in her dressing room; some tech guys are there to replace the 'tubes' in her monitor. Wizard of Oz conclusion.

Lola Heatherton - O'Hara; Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy; Johnny LaRue - Candy; Bill Needle - Thomas; Cole Elliot Durning - Moranis; Juul's TV Repair - Juul Haalmeyer Dancers, Dick Blasucci; The Tubes: Fee Waybill, Roger Steen, Bill "Sputnik" Spooner, Prairie Prince, Michael Cotten, Vince Welnick, Rick Anderson

9 SCTV Evening News: Zontar 150

Floyd has an item about Zontar that catches Earl off guard. Earl has an item about a cabbage truck that's overturned. In the control booth, the director is welcomed to Zontar...

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; John Blanchard - Barry Sand; Control room guy - extra; announcer - staff announcer

3e Zontar Wraparound Part 6: Boardroom 151

Gerry Todd sets up the advent screen for Zontar's announcement. Zontar punishes Hank Bain for failing him (to Big Jim and Billy Sol's approval). Zontar needs television entertainment and makes his demands: one nine-show cycle and three best ofs. However, after consulting an interplanetary almanac, Bones and Guy discover that Zontar is doomed. When Zontar explodes, the others snap out of it. Guy finds a moral and gives a stirring speech, concluding by admonishing us to watch the skies...

DeForest Kelly - Thomas; Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Hank Bain - Bonar Bain; Gerry Todd - Moranis; Zontar - Candy; Astrologers - Paul Flaherty, Dick Blasucci; Edith Prickley - Martin; Earl Camembert - Levy; Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; SCTV staff - extras

3d The Godfather Part 5a: Network War 1 84

The network newscasts all lead with the news of network war.

SCTV News: Network War

The television news headlines: network war. Earl gives an editorial, but SCTV is hit before he can finish.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; gangsters, crew - extras

Prickley informs Sonny and Ricky that SCTV's license is up for renewal, and that Guy, who is in hospital, has to take the broadcasting oath or they will lose the station.

Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Morton Dean - Moranis; CBS announcer - extra; Jessica Savage - O'Hara; Edith Prickley - Martin; Sonny Caballero - Levy; Michael (Ricky) Caballero - Moranis; Tom Hayden - Thomas; gangsters - extras

2 SCTV Staff Party Part 1 132

Maureen is checking cards at the door. Gerry Todd is shooting some video of the event, a video record, if you will. Tex and Edna arrive, passing out Boil Bucks, and start off the evening's entertainment with the Auctioneer's Song. Some other vignettes - Earl trying to cut into the liquor line; the N Neat Guy at the bar. LaRue arrives with some gerbils, half in the bag. Caballero sends him out into the street to do Streetbeef.

Maureen Wallace - O'Hara; Gerry Todd - Moranis; Tex Boil - Thomas; Edna Boil - Moranis; Earl Camembert - Levy; Johnny LaRue - Candy; Edith Prickley - Martin; N Neat Guy - Flaherty; Nikki - O'Hara; miscellaneous staff, gerbils - John McAndrew, extras

2b SCTV Staff Party Part 3 132

Tang and Nikki leave the Doorway to Hell set. Gerry gets a Christmas message from Camembert. Tongue tries to get Lola to do a 3D musical script he wrote.

Lin Ye Tang - Thomas; Nikki - O'Hara; Bobby Bittman - Levy; Earl Camembert - Levy; Gerry Todd - Moranis; Lola Heatherton - O'Hara; Dr Tongue - Candy; miscellaneous staff - extras

2c SCTV Staff Party Part 4 132

Caballero and Needle discuss syndication, and are filmed by Gerry Todd, who's also intrigued by the concept... They laugh maniacally for a bit. Guy gets a Christmas bomb from Big Jim and Billy Sol. Lola does a song ("White Christmas") and they all join in for a final crane shot, courtesy of LaRue.

Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Bill Needle - Thomas; Gerry Todd - Moranis; Bobby Bittman - Levy; Lola Heatherton - O'Hara; Edith Prickley - Martin; Dr Tongue - Candy; Earl Camembert - Levy; Johnny LaRue - Candy

9 One on the Town: Singles Bars Part 1

Earl investigates the Singles bar scene, to see how permissive it really is. He interviews the bartender and waiter, while trying to pick up chicks with some lame pickup lines.

Earl Camembert - Levy; singles - extras; Don the bartender - extra; Nick the waiter - extra; announcer - Moranis, staff announcer

9a One on the Town: Singles Bars Part 2

Earl, slightly drunk and his evening a failure, concludes that the singles bar scene is a myth.

Earl Camembert - Levy; singles - extras; announcer - staff announcer

10 Nightline Melonville: Unemployment 94

A fancy new set and format, and satellite link. Tonight, an in-depth probing look at the unemployment problem. Floyd interviews congressman Schaffer, while Earl interviews union representative Mach. Earl's satellite feed acts up.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Union representative Wayne Mach - Candy; Representative Vernon Schaffer - Thomas; announcer - staff announcer

8 Nightline Melonville: Kidnapping 103

Lead item: Mayor Shanks' grandson has been kidnapped. However, when they go to interview Shanks, Raymond is with him - the kid just went to have some sodas. When interviewed, the police chief expresses surprise that Nightline Melonville didn't lead with the story on the Salt II Nuclear Arms Treaty. Because "Knucklehead Camembert" thought he had a scoop, Floyd explains.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Tommy Shanks - Candy; Deward Weiss, Police Chief - Moranis; Raymond - extra; Shanks bag man - Levy; reporters - extras

10 Nightline Melonville: Milk slush fund 96

Melonville Mayor Tommy Shanks has been accused of siphoning thousands of dollars out of the milk fund. Earl tries to interview the Mayor, but Floyd, who is "under the weather", butts in and asks Shanks if his mother knew he stole that money. Shanks gets upset. Earl tries to take control and tells Floyd to shut up, and then tells Shanks to shut up. Shanks, ticked, comes down to the station to kick both their heads in.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Tommy Shanks - Candy

4 Nightline Melonville: Margaret Thatcher and Tip O'Neill 117

Exclusive interview with Tip and Margaret, but the fur doesn't fly as much as Earl and Floyd had hoped, despite their provocative questions.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Margaret Thatcher - O'Hara; Dennis Thatcher - extra; Tip O'Neill - Candy

2a Indecent Exposure Part 2: Accounting Office (Feb 15 12:30pm) 98

Perini arrives to clean up the office as the others leave for lunch. Fred arrives at the accounting office to inquire about a cheque he never received for an appearance he never made on Farm Film Report. Earl arrives, so Fred turns to him for help. Earl sets up a secret meeting.

Perini Scleroso - Martin; Fred Willard - Fred Willard; Secretaries - extras; Accountant - John Hemphill; Earl Camembert - Levy

2b Indecent Exposure Part 3: Parking Garage (Feb 15 12:50pm) 98

Earl has a secret meeting with Fred Willard, where Willard reveals his suspicions. Earl informs Fred that only Caballero can issue checks. Fred asks Earl not to go public.

Fred Willard - Fred Willard; Earl Camembert - Levy; staff leaving the garage - Ron James, extras

4 SCTV News: Indecent Exposure (Feb 15 6:00pm) 98

Earl breaks the story about Fred's cheque. Floyd has an item that Mayor Tommy Shanks has been institutionalized.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

8 SCTV News Update: Indecent Exposure 99

Earl has an update on the cheque forgery scandal, and has a live feed with Guy Caballero. Guy makes a statement. Earl weeps.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Allan 'Crazy Legs' Herschman (photo only) - Ramis

1 Promo: SCTV News Election Central 100

Earl and Floyd promote their election coverage.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

6 Commercial: Vic Hedges for Mayor, The Alternative 100

Vic shows a clip of Mayor Shanks' rampage on Nightline Melonville.

Clip: Nightline Melonville

Tommy Shanks - Candy; Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

Vic shows a clip of Shanks running after Earl, and suggests Shanks is a few bricks short of a load.

Vic Hedges - Flaherty; ethnic announcer - extra

20 SCTV News Election Central Part 1 101

SCTV has all the projections (using computers provided by Harry's Sex Shop and Computers), predicting losses for Shanks and Wellesly.

Polling Booth with Troy Soren

Tawny Beaver interviews Troy at the polling booth; he has a low opinion of SCTV News.

Tawny Beaver - Martin; Troy Soren - Short; Wife, voters - extras

Earl updates the results for various propositions - Melonville has voted in favor of another nuclear dump site. Earl taps Jimmy the Greek for the odds on the vote. And they have surprising news that Libby Wolfson has conceded.

Wellesly Campaign Headquarters

Robert arrives with Libby. Libby interrupts Robert's victory speech to share some thoughts.

Gump Smithers - Short; Robert Wellesly - David Rasche; Libby Wolfson - Martin; crowd - extras

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Jimmy the Greek - Candy; staff, crew - extras; Announcer - Levy

20a SCTV News Election Central Part 2 101

SCTV's projections are all turning out wrong. Earl and Floyd debate on what the result in the proposition to outlaw (or not, depending on the wording) disposable bottles means.

Polling Booth with Vic Hedges

Tawny Beaver asks Vic who he voted for.

Tawny Beaver - Martin; Vic Hedges - Flaherty; Press - extras

Mayor Shanks has won, and they have a live hookup.

Fireside Chat: Victory Speech

Tommy thanks us for getting him out of there, and feeds his stuffed dog pills and cough syrup.

Tommy Shanks - Candy

Earl reflects on what a Russian would have made of the day's events.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty

8 One on the Town: Urban Transit 159

Earl takes a hard-hitting look at urban transit, including bicycles, walking and subways. He interviews a parking lot attendant and tries to talk to a commuter. The upside to urban transit? The cop on the beat will spend less time giving tickets. But the cop on the beat kicks him off the street.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Cop - Hemphill; crew - extra; Duane the parking attendant - extra; announcer - staff announcer

5 Promo: SCTV News: Sweeps Week Items 107

Earl has an update on the item's they will be covering: house of prostitution raid, lingerie fashion show, strip search at girl's academy.

Earl Camembert - Levy; staff, hookers, models - extras

7 Promo: SCTV News 181

A hard hitting fast paced promo for SCTV News, highlighting the differences between Earl and Floyd.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; announcer - staff announcer

2b Spy Wrap Part 3: SCTV Dormitory, Low Life Wing 172

Vic Hedges gets cabin fever. Fred Winston, a young bootlick from the copy room, agrees to go see Yentl with Guy.

Vic Hedges - Flaherty; Brock Linehan - Short; Yolanda Devillbis - Martin; Fred Winston - Fred Willard; Ed Grimley - Short; Earl Camembert - Levy; Perini Scleroso - Martin; Happy Marsden - John Hemphill; Gus Gustofferson - Levy; Guy Caballero - Flaherty

2d Spy Wrap Part 5: SCTV Cafeteria 172

It's been a week since Guy and Fred saw Yentl, an Guy and Fred are getting along real well; Fred takes advantage by conceiving a new variety show featuring himself.

Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Edith Prickley - Martin; Fred Winston - Fred Willard; Perini Scleroso - Martin; Earl Camembert - Levy; Ed Grimley - Short; Happy Marsden - Hemphill; guards, diners - extras

2e Spy Wrap Part 6: SCTV Dormitory, Low Life Wing 173

A new bed and other amenities have arrived for Fred in the dormitory. The others suspect him of being the spy, so they beat him up. Gus breaks it up. Later in the night, Happy Marsden is caught red-handed phoning in some scripts.

Vic Hedges - Flaherty; Brock Linehan - Short; Yolanda Devillbis - Martin; Fred Winston - Fred Willard; Ed Grimley - Short; Earl Camembert - Levy; Perini Scleroso - Martin; Gus Gustofferson - Levy; Happy Marsden - John Hemphill; Fred Winston - Fred Willard; miscellaneous staff - extras

2f Spy Wrap Part 7: SCTV Cafeteria 173

Happy Marsden reveals the terrible secret that allowed him to be blackmailed. Guy finds a lesson in this experience, but interrupts his speech when Fred enters. Fred starts a speech of his own, but flubs his line and calls for his line. However, all the scripts are missing. Turns out this show has also been stolen by Showtime.

Guy Caballero - Flaherty; Fred Winston - Fred Willard; Ed Grimley - Short; Earl Camembert - Levy; Edith Prickley - Martin; Happy Marsden - John Hemphill; diners, crew - extras; alternate Guy Caballero - David Flaherty; alternate Fred Winston - John LeFebvre

2 Promo: Murray's File/Dialing for Dollars 161

Clips of Murray's File: Canadian Television and Dialing for Dollars with Earl Camembert hosting. While Murray's File did appear in show 11, the Dialing for Dollars sketch is not featured in any episodes.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Announcer - staff announcer

3 Newsbreak: Allenscam 175

Earl has a story on suspected corruption related to the building of the Melonville Art Dome. Brad Allen has been indicted. Brad is unflappable.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Bradley P Allen - Short; Mrs Allen - extra; press - extras

8 SCTV News Update: Jackie Withdraws 171

Jackie Rogers has withdrawn from the presidential race. Earl briefly reviews Jackie's campaign and then talks with Jackie live via satellite from Caesar's Palace. Jackie claims he decided to withdraw after receiving a call from Wayne Newton offering him an eight-week run in Vegas. Jackie has a song for his supporters, and falls in the pool.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Jackie Rogers Jr - Short; Ladies - extras; band - extras; announcer - staff announcer

6 SCTV News: Earl Retires 184

Floyd is late getting back from a taping of Monster Chiller Horror Theatre. Earl announces his retirement - he's going to lend his name to a line of clothing. Floyd arrives, causing a bit of a ruckus - he's loaded.

Floyd and Earl read the news. Floyd explains his tardiness - Jim the sound man is leaving MCHT. Floyd gives a stirring farewell speech - to Jim the sound man, and heads off to the party at the Driftwood.

Earl Camembert - Levy; Floyd Robertson / Count Floyd - Flaherty; announcer - staff announcer

SCTV News: Big News, Little News

Floyd has some very important news items. Earl has some very trivial news items. A reprise of the original News sketch.

Floyd Robertson - Flaherty; Earl Camembert - Levy